Monday morning. COME ON! Heart attack never stopped old big bear.

No! These are just strippers! Look how hot they are! It's Sunday, but screw it — juice box time.

Everything they do is so dramatic and flamboyant. It just makes me want to set myself on fire. If this were a Lifetime Moment of Truth movie, this would be our act break. But it wasn't. And although the intervention didn't work, it turned into one of the Bluth family's better parties. Turns out he ended up getting too friendly with the teddy bear. A Colombian cartel that WON'T kidnap and kill you. Say goodbye to THESE! Yes. Lindsay and I are planning a night of heterosexual intercourse.

Uncle Gob… was Aunt Lindsay ever pregnant? Yeah, sure, dozens of times. Touché, Pandora. I mean, it's one banana, Michael. What could it cost, ten dollars? Excuse me while I circumvent you. The old reach-around. You're losing blood, aren't you? Gob: Probably, my socks are wet. Buster, what are you doing with mother's rape horn? How am I supposed to find someone willing to go into that musty old claptrap? He also said some things African American-y wasn't ready to hear.

Michael, you are not quite the ladies man I had pictured. Hopefully, we will remedy that when we are in the spa spreading body chocolate on each other. It's, like, Hey, you want to go down to the whirlpool? Yeah, I don't have a husband. I call it Swing City. It was for me. I was going to smoke the marijuana like a cigarette. Uncle Gob… was Aunt Lindsay ever pregnant? Yeah, sure, dozens of times. Everyone's laughing, and riding, and cornholing except Buster. And the soup of the day is bread. I see you've wasted no time in filling my seat hole.

That's the first time we were in the shower since our honeymoon. And this time, no tears. And guess what else is back. [slow wink] My breakfast? My friskiness. Mama horny Michael. Well excuse me for liking the way they frame my junk! I could use a leather jacket for when I'm on my hog and have to go into a controlled slide. What have we always said is the most important thing? Those are balls. There's a new daddy in town. A discipline daddy. Well excuse me, Judge Reinhold.

If you don't start pulling your weight around here its going to be shape up, or…ship up. Are all the guys in here… you know? George Sr.: No, not all of them. Barry: Yeah. It's never the ones you hope. A lady of the evening. Working girl. She turns illusions for money. Shémale.

What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard. She's not 'that Mexican', Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Colombian or something.

I'm a complete failure. I can't even fake the death of a stripper. We need a name. Maybe "Operation Hot Mother." No, let's try to top that. (They never did.) Look at us, crying like a bunch of girls on the last day of camp. The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. They want to break his legs. It's a good thing he's already got that little scooter. And although the intervention didn't work, it turned into one of the Bluth family's better parties.

Ah, it is a rock, though. Should beat everything. Gob: There's not a lot of logic to it. He… she… what's the difference? Oh hear, hear. In the dark, it all looks the same. Early. A Colombian cartel that WON'T kidnap and kill you.