I'm a complete failure. I can't even fake the death of a stripper. I made a huge tiny mistake. I'm gonna build me an airport, put my name on it. Why, Michael? So you can fly away from your feelings? Are all the guys in here… you know? George Sr: No not all of them. Barry: Yeah. It's never the ones you hope. Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass! Everybody dance… NOW. I was once called the worst audience participant Cirque du Soleil ever had. You're a good guy, mon frere. That means brother in French. I don't know how I know that. I took four years of Spanish.

Well excuse me, Judge Reinhold. If this were a Lifetime Moment of Truth movie, this would be our act break. But it wasn't. Don't ask "Can I"… ask "I Can!" Are all the guys in here… you know? George Sr: No not all of them. Barry: Yeah. It's never the ones you hope. Now, do you wanna steer, or are you too old to sit on your Pop's lap and drive? Her lawyers are claiming the seal is worth $250,000. And that's not even including Buster's Swatch. No, I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being WITH you.

Did Ted make an appointment? No. Well, then Ted can GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS OFFICE! YOU GET THE HELL OUT! Heyyyyy, hermano.

Heyyyy uncle father Oscar. ♪♪ Big yellow joint, big yellow joint, I'll meet you down at the big yellow joint. ♪♪ Either I zip down, or he zips up, and that is a mighty long zipper on Mother's Cher jumpsuit. It's one banana Michael, what could it cost, ten dollars? She wanted to look 48. I nearly airbrushed her into oblivion. Ended up checking "albino" on the form. We'll have to find something to do so that people can look at you without wanting to kill themselves. So, what do you say? We got a basket full of father-son fun here. What's Kama Sutra oil? Maybe it's not for us. Yeah, like I'm going to spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit? Come on!

She keeps saying that God is going to show me a sign. The… something of my ways. Wisdom? In the mid '90s, Tobias formed a folk music band with Lindsay and Maebe which he called Dr. Funke's 100 Percent Natural Good Time Family Band Solution. The group was underwritten by the Natural Food Life Company, a division of Chem-Grow, an Allen Crayne acqusition, which was part of the Squimm Group. Their motto was simple: We keep you alive.

Shémale. I hear the jury's still out on science. The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. Gob: You didn't eat that, did you? You mean the guy we're meeting with can't even grow his own hair? Come on! I'll sacrifice anything for my children. A sea of waiters and no one will take a drink order. Oh, yeah, the guy in the the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. Come on!

Please refrain from discussing or engaging in any sort of interoffice [bleep] or [bleep] or finger[bleep] or [bleep]sting or [bleep] or even [bleep]. Wow. We're just blowing through nap time, aren't we?

Make love in your *own* hand, Mother! A group of British builders operating outside the O.C. So did you see the new Poof? His name's Gary and we don't need anymore lawsuits. Now, do you wanna steer, or are you too old to sit on your Pop's lap and drive? I am getting rid of this thing. It has caused me nothing but pride and self-respect. It seems like only yesterday you were bursting forth from your mother's fertile womb. It's sort of like going from prime rib to… I don't know… weird brother of prime rib. And I wouldn't just lie there, if that's what you're thinking. That's not what I WAS thinking.

Pound is tic-tac-toe, right? You stay on top of her, Buddy. Don't be afraid to ride her. Hard. Annhog's coming? Coo coo ca chaw. Coo coo ca chaw.

No borders, no limits… go ahead, touch the Cornballer… you know best? Well, if you want to play Eve, you got to get in line behind what, above five homos. Can you believe that the only reason the club is going under is because it's in a terrifying neighborhood? Smack of ham. What is she doing at a beauty pageant? Is she running the lights or something? This is not me encouraging you to go here and write a review. No. I am going to my spin class. I thought you had vertigo. And don't make the water too hot. The scabs come right off. That's how Tony Wonder lost a nut.