What about macaroni – let me finish – salad? Actually, that was a box of Oscar's legally obtained medical marijuana. Primo bud. Real sticky weed. A trick is something a whore does for money…or candy. … or cocaine. These are my awards, Mother. From Army. The seal is for marksmanship, and the gorilla is for sand racing. George Michael, you want to put your head down there by his drainage shunt? I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it's hard to hear anything over the clatter of her breasts. I made a huge tiny mistake.

Even it means me taking a chubby… I will suck it up. Hair up, glasses off. Bob Loblaw Law Blog. If you're suggesting I play favorites, you're wrong. I love all of my children equally. [earlier] I don't care for Gob.

What do you expect, Mother? I'm half machine! I'm a monster!! Her lawyers are claiming the seal is worth $250,000. And that's not even including Buster's Swatch. Also, your knee is on my heart.

Quicken! Premiere! There are dozens of us! DOZENS! She's trying to prove that she's closer to my children than I am, but the joke's on her, because she doesn't know how little I care for GOB. I've been in the film business for a while but I just can't seem to get one in the can. It's a jetpack, Michael. What could go wrong? Hey, it was one night of wild passion! And yet you didn't notice her body? I like to look in the mirror.

Absolutely. And we're going to be here every day. I don't care if it takes from now till the end of Shrimpfest. Let's see some bananas and nuts! Operation Hot Mother. I was once called the worst audience participant Cirque du Soleil ever had. Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot… your wife is dead! Fried cheese… with club sauce.

You just made a fool out of yourself in front of T-Bone. I've always been deeply passionate about nature. Perhaps you remember Neuterfest?

Waiting for the Emmys. BTW did you know won 6 Emmys and was still canceled early by Fox? COME ON. Yes, he's like the steel man from The Wizard From Oz. I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run..so now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.

And don't make the water too hot. The scabs come right off. I don't criticize you! And if you're worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense.

My brother wasn't optimistic it could be done, but I didn't take "wasn't optimistic it could be done" for an answer. She tried pesto for the first time. Imagine that, 92 years old and she never tried pesto. Mom… after all these years, God's not going to take a call from you. So you take your mom to work every day? Bummer. Moms are such a pain in the ass, huh? It's, like, die already!

Chicken fingers… with spicy club sauce. You stay on top of her, Buddy. Don't be afraid to ride her. Hard.