And here you are coming out of your mother's third base! You might enjoy this. Oh. Em. Gee. That's amazing. It's a jetpack, Michael. What could go wrong? Douche chill!

When a.. man.. needs to prove to a woman that he's actually.. [pause].. When a man loves a woman.. I didn't mean who… I meant… her? So did you see the new Poof? His name's Gary and we don't need anymore lawsuits. The only person that gets Lucille this excited is Gene. Dead Dove DO NOT EAT.

One of the guys told me to take my head out of my BOTTOM and get back to work…my BOTTOM! Hahahaha. It's so watery. And yet there's a smack of ham to it. What have we always said is the most important thing? I don't care if it takes from now till the end of Shrimpfest. Shémale. Look at us, crying like a couple of girls on the last day of camp. Oh, yeah, the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in 3 months. Come on!

Well, I hope you also carry a spare bowl of candy beans. Say goodbye to THESE! I'm in Vegas this week and would like to point out the Blue Man Group is *actually* hiring. The support group? What about macaroni – let me finish – salad? You burn down the storage unit? Oh, most definitely. I know, I just call her Annabelle cause she's shaped like a…she's the belle of the ball! Michael was having brunch with Sally Sitwell at a restaurant called Skip Church's Bistro. In addition to brunch, the restaurant was known for an item on the menu called the "Skip's Scramble", an omelet that contained everything on the menu. Do not order the Skip's Scramble. Yeah, I invited her. You said you wanted to spend time some with her. You said I was being an Ann hog.

What do you think about Sudden Valley? It sounds like a salad dressing, but for some reason I don't want to eat it. What about macaroni – let me finish – salad? No, it's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard. OH MY GOD, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE… sale. Oh, the burning! ♪♪ Amaaaaaaziiiing Graaaace ♪♪ Got a big ass room at the travelodge. What a fun, sexy time for you. Today I learned this is a real place, tho more lush than the OC. It walked on my pillow!

I cheated and I lied and I whored around. [sniffs hand] Oh, God. I'm going to run this through again on "pots and pans." Family Love Michael. Yeah, that's a cultural problem is what it is. You know, your average American male is in a perpetual state of adolescence, you know, arrested development. (Hey. That's the name of the show!) These are my awards, Mother. From Army. The seal is for marksmanship, and the gorilla is for sand racing. This is not what it looks like. It looks like you're tweaking her nipples through a chain-link fence. See for more good stuff.

I hate the Wetlands. They're stupid and wet, and there are bugs everywhere, and I think I maced a crane. A million ****ing diamonds! You're losing blood, aren't you? Gob: Probably, my socks are wet. I was set up. By the Brits. A group of British builders operating outside the O.C. George Michael, you want to put your head down there by his drainage shunt? I just don't want him to point out my cracker ass in front of Ann. I never thought I'd miss a hand so much! Caw ca caw, caw ca caw, caw ca caw, caw ca caw.

But I'm the oldest. The matriarch if you will. Could it be love? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard.

Oh, yes, there absolutely will be a margarita made in my mouth. Annhog's coming? Of course. The "Bob Loblaw Law Blog." Wow. You, sir, are a mouthful! When a man needs to prove to a woman that he's actually… When a man loves a woman… Say goodbye to THESE!

Did Ted make an appointment? No. Well then Ted can GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS OFFICE! YOU GET THE HELL OUT! Buster, what are you doing with mother's rape-horn? What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese? Hahahahah! Could it be love? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard. It feels good to be back in a queen! This is not me encouraging you to go here and write a review. No.