Do you have any idea how often you say the word "afraid"? Well, I know I used it in the Jacuzzi. She's trying to prove that she's closer to my children than I am, but the joke's on her, because she doesn't know how little I care for GOB. Suddenly playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit?

So, what do you say? We got a basket full of father-son fun here. What's Kama Sutra oil? Maybe it's not for us. The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. Gob: You didn't eat that, did you?

Oh Gob, you could charm the black off a telegram boy. I think the only time you cooked for us was the morning Rosa's mom died. You gave us cereal in an ashtray. Second-of-ly, I know you're the big marriage expert. Oh I'm sorry, I forgot, your wife is dead.

They're not gonna strip, right? I told them not to, but I can't guarantee their instincts won't kick in. I've always been deeply passionate about nature. Perhaps you remember Neuterfest? I'll never forget your wedding. I will pack your sweet pink mouth with so much ice cream you'll be the envy of every Jerry and Jane on the block! WHY was this show cancelled? I mean, COME ON. I'm a scholar. I enjoy scholarly pursuits. Suddenly playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit?

No, she's in it. She's a contestant. It's sorta like an inner beauty pageant. Ah, there it is. Taste the happy, Michael. Taste it. It tastes kind of like sad. Oh, yeah. The guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. COME ON! What, so the guy we are meeting with can't even grow his own hair? COME ON! Suddenly playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit? If I look like a man who made love to his wife last night – it's because I almost did. And that is why Jesus was often referred to as the King of Kings. Queens. The King of Queens.

I [bleeped] the business model. Yeah, she had all kinds of orgasms. With spicy club sauce. Hair up, glasses off. What have we always said is the most important thing? How do you know Steve Holt? Are you in AA? Hey, maybe you could pop a tent outside with your cousin Maeby… it'd be a good chance to rub off on her. Whoa whoa whoa whoa. Wait. Are you telling me you have a multi-stage trick with hidden identities?

A sea of waiters and no one will take a drink order. I know what an erection feels like, Michael. Chickens don't clap! I cheated and I lied and I whored around. If I wanted something your thumb touched I'd eat the inside of your ear. Michael was concerned that he was caught in a lie about his family. The family was concerned that they were being confronted by a woman they had clubbed, drugged, and left on a bench.

Uncle Gob… was Aunt Lindsay ever pregnant? Yeah, sure, dozens of times. Are you aware of this? Coming soon. Indeed. Oh, yeah. The guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. COME ON! WHY was this show cancelled? I mean, COME ON. Yo quiero leche. Yo quiero leche de madre. Did you know that more frozen bananas are sold right here on this boardwalk than anywhere on the OC? Heyyyy Uncle Father Oscar.

Hey, it was one night of wild passion! And yet you didn't notice her body? I like to look in the mirror. A night of heterosexual intercourse. Please refrain from Mayoneggs during this salmonella scare. However, she mistook the drowsy eye alcohol warning for a winking eye alcohol suggestion. I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it's hard to hear anything over the clatter of her breasts.

A lady of the evening. Working girl. She turns illusions for money. Steve Holt? The moron jock? We'll have to find something to do so that people can look at you without wanting to kill themselves. It was for me. I was going to smoke the marijuana like a cigarette.