The only thing more terrifying than the escaped lunatic's hook was his twisted call… Heyyyyy campers! Teamocil. Oh…yeah…the guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. Come on! Hey, look at that – you're mean sober, too. Taste the happy, Michael. Taste it. It tastes kind of like sad. A Colombian cartel that WON'T kidnap and kill you. We need a name. Maybe 'Operation Hot Mother'. Oh, yeah. The guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. COME ON!

So, what do you say? We got a basket full of father-son fun here. What's Kama Sutra oil? Maybe it's not for us. Someone order 140 pounds of upper body strength? Coo coo ca chaw. Coo coo ca chaw. Coo coo ca chaw. But I'm the oldest. The matriarch if you will.

GENE!! [screams] Waiting for the Emmys. BTW did you know won 6 Emmys and was still canceled early by Fox? COME ON. Friend of mine from college. He also has a boat tho not called the Seaward.

There's a girl in my soup! First I blow him, then I poke him. Absolutely. And we're going to be here every day. I don't care if it takes from now till the end of Shrimpfest. You might enjoy this. Oh. Em. Gee. That's amazing. No, I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being WITH you. Pound is tic-tac-toe right?

You stay on top of her Buddy. Don't be afraid to ride her. Hard. I don't care if it takes from now till the end of Shrimpfest. There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town. Well, that certainly leaves me out.

When a.. man.. needs to prove to a woman that he's actually.. [pause].. When a man loves a woman.. She calls it a mayonegg. What do you expect, Mother? I'm half machine! I'm a monster!! Popcorn shrimp… with club sauce. Annyong.

I'd rather be dead in California than alive in Arizona. Although George Michael had only got to second base, he'd gone in head first, like Pete Rose. Suddenly playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit? If this tableau I recreate, perhaps I can re-snare my mate. One of the guys told me to take my head out of my BOTTOM and get back to work…my BOTTOM! Hahahaha. So did you see the new Poof? His name's Gary, and we don't need anymore lawsuits. I'll have a vodka rocks. (Mom, it's breakfast time.) And a piece of toast. Why are you squeezing me with your body? It's a hug, Michael. I'm hugging you.

What about macaroni – let me finish – salad? Hey, maybe you could pop a tent outside with your cousin Maeby… it'd be a good chance to rub off on her. The Man Inside Me seems well reviewed. I don't criticize you! And if you're worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense. Of course. The "Bob Loblaw Law Blog." Wow. You, sir, are a mouthful! What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese?

They want to break his legs. It's a good thing he's already got that little scooter. I will be a bigger and hairier mole than the one on your inner left thigh! She's a contestant. It's sorta like an inner beauty pageant. Ah, there it is. Don't call my escorts whores. The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. Gob: You didn't eat that, did you? What do you expect, Mother? I'm half machine! I'm a monster!!

You're losing blood, aren't you? Probably, my socks are wet. Turns out he ended up getting too friendly with the teddy bear.