This was a big get for God. O-kay, who'd like a banger in the mouth? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard. Second-of-ly, I know you're the big marriage expert. Oh I'm sorry, I forgot, your wife is dead. Hola, is Rosa still alive? No? Well this is not my day.

You stay on top of her, Buddy. Don't be afraid to ride her. Hard. She keeps saying that God is going to show me a sign. The… something of my ways. Wisdom? No, I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. We all need to pick a day to try and make trend. The worst that could happen is that I could spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit. COME ON.

It's a wonderful restaurant! Well, OK, have sex with this girl. Right now. Get in there, have some sex with her. Hey, Dad. Look at you. You're a year older…and a year closer to death. Buster: Oh yeah, I guess that's kind of funny.

If this were a Lifetime Moment of Truth movie, this would be our act break. But it wasn't. It just seems like there's still light coming in from under the door. Why are you squeezing me with your body? It's a hug, Michael. I'm hugging you. I just haven't had sex in a month. You know, you've been here two months. It's hard to gauge time. I know, I just call her Annabelle cause she's shaped like a… she's the belle of the ball! We have unlimited juice? This party is going to be off the hook.

What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese? Hey, maybe you could pop a tent outside with your cousin Maeby… it'd be a good chance to rub off on her. Hey, it was one night of wild passion! And yet you didn't notice her body? I like to look in the mirror. She keeps saying that God is going to show me a sign. The… something of my ways. Wisdom? It's probably wisdom.

Friday night. NO TOUCHING! If this tableau I recreate, perhaps I can re-snare my mate.

Hey, maybe you could pop a tent outside with your cousin Maeby… it'd be a good chance to rub off on her. Fun and failure both start out the same way. Either I zip down, or he zips up, and that is a mighty long zipper on Mother's Cher jumpsuit. I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it's hard to hear anything over the clatter of her breasts.

Don't leave your Uncle T-bag hanging. The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. She's not that Mexican, Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Columbian or something.

There's been a lot of lying in this family. And a lot of love! More lies. I've got a nice hard cot with his name on it. You'd do that to your own brother? I said "cot." Everybody dance… NOW.

Are you aware of this? Coming soon. Indeed. Well, I hope you also carry a spare bowl of candy beans. Hair up, glasses off. Did Ted make an appointment? No. Well then Ted can GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS OFFICE! YOU GET THE HELL OUT! Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass. Second-of-ly, I know you're the big marriage expert. Oh I'm sorry, I forgot, your wife is dead. Oh, yes, there absolutely will be a margarita made in my mouth.