I could use a leather jacket for when I'm on my hog and have to go into a controlled slide. Happy. Friday night. A Colombian cartel that WON'T kidnap and kill you. Taste the happy, Michael. Taste it. It tastes kind of like sad.

Oh, hi, Mom. I have the afternoon free. Really? Did "nothing" cancel? Why are you squeezing me with your body? Buster, what are you doing with mother's rape horn? Are you sure this isn't her sister? Mrs Veal: What a lovely thing to say. Michael: That's an awful thing to say.

I'll buy you a hundred George Michaels that you can teach to drive! Also, your knee is on my heart. I need a fake passport, preferably to France… I like the way they think. I don't want no part of yo tight-ass country-club, ya freak bitch! Tobias is Queen Mary. Excuse me while I circumvent you. The old reach-around. They frame my junk.

Did you enjoy your lunch, mom? You drank it fast enough. You need to do more with Rita. Believe me, I'd like to. You want your belt to buckle, not your chair. Everything they do is so dramatic and flamboyant. It just makes me want to set myself on fire. - Lucille Bluth.

Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist. There's unlimited juice? This party is gonna be off the hook.

I [bleeped] the business model. Yeah, she had all kinds of orgasms. She's not 'that Mexican', Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Colombian or something.

I will pack your sweet pink mouth with so much ice cream you'll be the envy of every Jerry and Jane on the block! If I look like a man who made love to his wife last night – it's because I almost did. Don't leave your Uncle T-bag hanging. A trick is something a whore does for money… or cocaine. Mission Accomplished.

Friend of mine from college. He also has a boat tho not called the Seaward. That coat costs more than your house! He also said some things African American-y wasn't ready to hear. If you didn't have adult onset diabetes, I wouldn't mind giving you a little sugar. Actually, that was a box of Oscar's legally obtained medical marijuana. Primo bud. Real sticky weed. I was once called the worst audience participant Cirque du Soleil ever had. A-coodle-doodle-doo. A-coodle-doodle-doo. Oh Gob, you could charm the black off a telegram boy.

There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town. Well, that certainly leaves me out. Maybe it was the other George Michael. You know, the singer-songwriter. Look at us, crying like a bunch of girls on the last day of camp. Tobias is Queen Mary. You were just a turd out there, you know? You couldn't kick, and you couldn't run, you know? You were just a turd. Well, Michael, I did not find their buffoonery amusing.

So you take your mom to work every day? Bummer. Moms are such a pain in the ass, huh? It's, like, die already! Buster's in what we like to call a light to no coma. In laymans terms, it might be considered a very heavy nap. Family Love Michael. What is she doing at a beauty pageant? Is she running the lights or something? What do you think about Sudden Valley? It sounds like a salad dressing, but for some reason I don't want to eat it. Perhaps an attic shall I seek. But I didn't take wasn't optimistic it could be done for an answer.