Hey, it was one night of wild passion! And yet you didn't notice her body? I like to look in the mirror. He's a regular Freddie Wilson, that one. But I'm the oldest. The matriarch if you will. I'm a complete failure. I can't even fake the death of a stripper. You want to have some guy reach around you in the middle of the night, start messing with your junk?

Say something that will terrify me. Lindsay: F*** me. Tobias: No, that didn't do it. Tobias is Queen Mary. Do you have any idea how often you say the word "afraid"? Well, I know I used it in the Jacuzzi. No! These are just strippers! Look how hot they are! Yeah, well, have you seen the new Mustang? You could hump that hood. I hate the Wetlands. They're stupid and wet, and there are bugs everywhere, and I think I maced a crane. The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. Gob: You didn't eat that, did you?

This show was cancelled. I mean, COME ON. There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town. Well, that certainly leaves me out. Those are balls.

We need a name. Maybe 'Operation Hot Mother'. You are a worse psychiatrist than you are a son-in-law and you will never get work as an actor because you have no talent. And I am rock steady. No more dizzies.

I've been in the film business for a while but I just cant seem to get one in the can. Uncle Gob, was Aunt Lindsay ever pregnant? Yeah, sure, dozens of times. I just haven't had sex in a month. You know, you've been here two months. It's hard to gauge time. No, Pop-pop does not get a treat. I just bought you a f**king pizza. Do you have any idea how often you say the word afraid? Well, I know I used it in the Jacuzzi. I've made a huge tiny mistake. Well excuse me, Judge Reinhold! I will be a bigger and hairier mole than the one on your inner left thigh!

You are a worse psychiatrist than you are a son-in-law and you will never get work as an actor because you have no talent. Say something that will terrify me. Lindsay: F*** me. Tobias: No, that didn't do it. I see you've wasted no time in filling my seat hole. Hey, it was one night of wild passion! And yet you didn't notice her body? I like to look in the mirror. Ah coodle doodle doo, ah coodle doodle doo.

Aren't you the sweetest thing, spending time with what's left of your uncle. Speaking of settling, How's Ann? Excuse me while I circumvent you. The old reach-around.

So Ann, the question is, do you want a man or a boy? I know how I would answer. Friend of mine from college. He also has a boat tho not called the Seaward. Everything they do is so dramatic and flamboyant. It just makes me want to set myself on fire. - Lucille Bluth.

Mom… after all these years, God's not going to take a call from you. Well excuse me, Judge Reinhold. Taste the happy, Michael! Taste it! [Stabbing Gob] White power! Gob: I'm white! Oh, hi, Mom. I have the afternoon free. Really? Did "nothing" cancel? You're losing blood, aren't you? Probably, my socks are wet. Do you have any idea how often you say the word "afraid"? Well, I know I used it in the Jacuzzi. If you don't start pulling your weight around here its going to be shape up, or…ship up.

Heyyyy Uncle Father Oscar. Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass. Friday night. My brother wasn't optimistic it could be done, but I didn't take "wasn't optimistic it could be done" for an answer. With spicy club sauce. Can you believe that the only reason the club is going under is because it's in a terrifying neighborhood? Did you know that more frozen bananas are sold right here on this boardwalk than anywhere in the OC?