You go buy a tape recorder and record yourself for a whole day. I think you'll be surprised at some of your phrasing. That was Tom Cruise, the actor. Lucille: They said he was some kind of scientist. It's one banana Michael, what could it cost, ten dollars? You want your belt to buckle, not your chair. What do you think about Sudden Valley? It sounds like a salad dressing, but for some reason I don't want to eat it.

Hey, it was one night of wild passion! And yet you didn't notice her body? I like to look in the mirror. Yes, he's like the steel man from The Wizard From Oz. Heyyyyy, hermano. Oh, yeah, the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in 3 months. Come on! I'll sacrifice anything for my children.

Way to plant, Ann! Could it be love? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite… like my heart is getting hard.

Michael, you are not quite the ladies man I had pictured. Hopefully, we will remedy that when we are in the spa spreading body chocolate on each other. He's a regular Freddie Wilson, that one. Ohhh little guy. The tears aren't coming. The tears just aren't coming.

Are you aware of this? Coming soon. Indeed. Talk you off what, Pop Pop? Her lawyers are claiming the seal is worth $250,000. And that's not even including Buster's Swatch. I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it's hard to hear anything over the clatter of her breasts. Well, yeah you've gotta lock that down. One of the guys told me to take my head out of my BOTTOM and get back to work…my BOTTOM! "Circumvent." It means "to go around." Gob: The old "reach around."

Oh Gob, you could charm the black off a telegram boy. ♪♪ It ain't easy being white… ♪♪ Heart attack never stopped old big bear. Bob Loblaw Lobs Law Bomb. A million [bleep]ing diamonds! I call it Tricks –- wait for it – Around The Office. I believe you will find the dessert to be both engrossing and high-grossing! So we don't get dessert?

This was a big get for God. This is not what it looks like. It looks like you're tweaking her nipples through a chain-link fence.

I've been in the film business for a while but I just cant seem to get one in the can. Are you aware of this? Coming soon. Indeed. Heyyyy Uncle Father Oscar.

What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese? God knows they're squinters. But I did finally get into Dad's pants. Although I had to have the crotch taken in a little bit. If I make this comeback, I'll buy you a hundred George Michaels that you can teach to drive! GENE!! [screams] Friday night. Go ahead, touch the Cornballer.

I've used one adjective to describe myself. What is it? Chicken fingers… with spicy club sauce. I'm a complete failure. I can't even fake the death of a stripper. No one was making fun of Andy Griffith. I can't emphasize that enough. There are dozens of us! Dozens! There's a new daddy in town. A discipline daddy.