♪♪ It's The Final Countdown ♪♪ And here you are coming out of your mother's third base! You're losing blood, aren't you? Probably, my socks are wet. Wine only turns to alcohol if you let it sit. These are my awards, Mother. From Army. The seal is for marksmanship, and the gorilla is for sand racing.

Could it be love? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite… like my heart is getting hard. Don't worry, these young beauties have been nowhere near the bananas. Either I zip down, or he zips up, and that is a mighty long zipper on Mother's Cher jumpsuit. I am getting rid of this thing. It has caused me nothing but pride and self-respect.

Did Ted make an appointment? No. Well then Ted can GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS OFFICE! YOU GET THE HELL OUT! Hey, maybe you could pop a tent outside with your cousin Maeby… it'd be a good chance to rub off on her. Wow. We're just blowing through nap time, aren't we. I may have committed some light treason. In the mid '90s, Tobias formed a folk music band with Lindsay and Maebe which he called Dr. Funke's 100 Percent Natural Good Time Family Band Solution. The group was underwritten by the Natural Food Life Company, a division of Chem-Grow, an Allen Crayne acqusition, which was part of the Squimm Group. Their motto was simple: We keep you alive. Talk you off what, Pop Pop? Buster, what are you doing with mother's rape horn?

He's going to be all right. It's Sunday, but screw it — juice box time. I'm afraid I'm with Michael on this one. The guy runs a prison, he can have any piece of ass he wants. I know, I just call her Annabelle cause she's shaped like a… she's the belle of the ball!

The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. No, I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. You go buy a tape recorder and record yourself for a whole day. I think you'll be surprised at some of your phrasing. Excuse me, do these effectively hide my thunder? George Michael, you want to put your head down there by his drainage shunt?

I'll buy you a hundred George Michaels that you can teach to drive! Did Ted make an appointment? No. Well then Ted can GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS OFFICE! YOU GET THE HELL OUT! They don't allow you to have bees in here. Please refrain from Mayoneggs during this salmonella scare.

Even though so many people in this office are begging for it. WHY was this show cancelled? I mean, COME ON. It's so watery. And yet there's a smack of ham to it. She wanted to look 48. I nearly airbrushed her into oblivion. Ended up checking "albino" on the form. How could I say no to the woman who gave me chlamydia? I don't appreciate the dry British humor. Oh Gob, you could charm the black off a telegram boy.

And I am rock steady. No more dizzies. There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town. Well, that certainly leaves me out. Pound is tic-tac-toe, right? This is not what it looks like. It looks like you're tweaking her nipples through a chain-link fence. Yes, Annyong. Your name is Annyong! We all know you're Annyong!

I'M A MONSTER!! You are a worse psychiatrist than you are a son-in-law and you will never get work as an actor because you have no talent.

Absolutely. And we're going to be here every day. I don't care if it takes from now till the end of Shrimpfest. Oh, yeah, the guy in the the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. Come on!