This show was cancelled. I mean, COME ON. When a.. man.. needs to prove to a woman that he's actually.. [pause].. When a man loves a woman.. Excuse me while I circumvent you. The old reach-around.

Excuse me while I circumvent you. The old reach-around. YOU'RE the Chiclet! Not me. Caw ca caw, caw ca caw, caw ca caw!

Even though sooooo many people in this office are begging for it. A night of heterosexual intercourse. No, no, it's pronounced a-nal-ra-pist. Of course. The "Bob Loblaw Law Blog." Wow. You, sir, are a mouthful! Ann certainly has a great deal of Mass.

And THAT'S why you always leave a note. Don't worry, these young beauties have been nowhere near the bananas. A trick is something a whore does for money… or cocaine. Well, I hope you also carry a spare bowl of candy beans.

A-coodle-doodle-doo. A-coodle-doodle-doo. If I wanted something your thumb touched I'd eat the inside of your ear. I will be a bigger and hairier mole than the one on your inner left thigh!

I am having a love affair with this ice cream sandwich. It walked on my pillow! If mother sees this, she will blow a cow. I think I might have someone who's going to circumvrent the law.

You stay on top of her, Buddy. Don't be afraid to ride her. Hard. Whenever she'd change clothes, she'd make me wait on the balcony until zip-up, and yet anything goes at bath time. Do you have any idea how often you say the word afraid? Well, I know I used it in the Jacuzzi.

Yeah, I invited her. You said you wanted to spend time some with her. You said I was being an Ann hog. Hair up, glasses off. Oh, I can just taste those meaty leading man parts in my mouth. Dad would stage elaborate situations using a one-armed man to teach us lessons. She's trying to prove that she's closer to my children than I am, but the joke's on her, because she doesn't know how little I care for GOB. She keeps saying that God is going to show me a sign. The… something of my ways. Wisdom? It's probably wisdom. Let's see some bananas and nuts!

You can control your bladder when you're dead! I've used one adjective to describe myself. What is it? I just haven't had sex in a month. You know, you've been here two months. It's hard to gauge time. Those are balls.

I'm gonna go get sexy. Also, your knee is on my heart. I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard. I'M A MONSTER!! Speaking of settling, how's Ann? I know, I just call her Annabelle cause she's shaped like a…she's the belle of the ball!