No one was making fun of Andy Griffith. I can't emphasize that enough. If this were a Lifetime Moment of Truth movie, this would be our act break. But it wasn't.

I never thought I'd miss a hand so much! You need to do more with Rita. Believe me, I'd like to. They want to break his legs. It's a good thing he's already got that little scooter. What do you think about Sudden Valley? It sounds like a salad dressing, but for some reason I don't want to eat it.

And here you are coming out of your mother's third base! See for more good stuff. [Stabbing Gob] White power! Gob: I'm white! I am getting rid of this thing. It has caused me nothing but pride and self-respect. It's a jetpack, Michael. What could possibly go wrong?

No, no, it's pronounced a-nal-ra-pist. It wasn't really the pronunciation that bothered me. Let's make Ann the backup, okay? Very good way to think about her, as a backup. I'll sacrifice anything for my children. I just dont want him to point out my cracker ass in front of Ann. First I blow him, then I poke him. Popcorn shrimp… with club sauce. He… she… what's the difference? Oh hear, hear. In the dark, it all looks the same.

If that man's straight, then I am sober. Steve Holt? The moron jock? She keeps saying that God is going to show me a sign. The… something of my ways. If you didn't have adult onset diabetes, I wouldn't mind giving you a little sugar. Friend of mine from college. He also has a boat tho not called the Seaward. Oh please. They didn't sneak into this country to be your friends. I was set up. By the Brits. A group of British builders operating outside the O.C.

I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it's hard to hear anything over the clatter of her breasts. What do you think about Sudden Valley? It sounds like a salad dressing, but for some reason I don't want to eat it.

He… she… what's the difference? Oh hear, hear. In the dark, it all looks the same. After all, why should you go to jail for a crime somebody else noticed? For the same reason you should believe a hundred dollar bill is no more than a hundred pennies! Let me out that Queen. We all need to pick a day to try and make trend. Those are balls. I hear the jury's still out on science.

Are you sure this isn't her sister? Mrs Veal: What a lovely thing to say. Michael: That's an awful thing to say. It's sort of like going from prime rib to… I don't know… weird brother of prime rib. Chaw-chee, chaw-chee chaw-chee! Coo coo ca cha! Ah coodle doodle do Caw ca caw, caw ca caw. Mr. Zuckerkorn, you've been warned about touching. Barry: You said spanking. I made a huge tiny mistake. Smack of ham. What is she doing at a beauty pageant? Is she running the lights or something? Michael, you are not quite the ladies man I had pictured. Hopefully, we will remedy that when we are in the spa spreading body chocolate on each other. Oh, COME ON!

How could I say no to the woman who gave me chlamydia? Great, now I'm gonna smell to high heaven like a tuna melt! The worst that could happen is that I could spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit. COME ON. Chaw-chee, chaw-chee chaw-chee! Coo coo ca cha! Ah coodle doodle do Caw ca caw, caw ca caw. A group of British builders operating outside the O.C. Hey, Dad. Look at you. You're a year older…and a year closer to death. Buster: Oh yeah, I guess that's kind of funny.

Michael, look, this has got to stop. I mean, flattered? Yes. Interested? Not tonight. Hey, it was one night of wild passion! And yet you didn't notice her body? I like to look in the mirror. Annhog's coming? Mister gay is bleeding! Mister gay! Everybody dance… NOW.