I don't appreciate the dry British humor. I will pack your sweet pink mouth with so much ice cream you'll be the envy of every Jerry and Jane on the block! I need a tea to give my dingle less tingle. I figured out a way to make money while I'm working!

There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town. Well, that certainly leaves me out. Got a big ass room at the travelodge. What a fun, sexy time for you. Now, do you wanna steer, or are you too old to sit on your Pop's lap and drive?

Pound is tic-tac-toe right? This objectification of women has to stop. It's just Mom and whores. Are you sure this isn't her sister? Mrs Veal: What a lovely thing to say. Michael: That's an awful thing to say.

I cheated and I lied and I whored around. One of the guys told me to take my head out of my BOTTOM and get back to work…my BOTTOM! Oh please. They didn't sneak into this country to be your friends.

One for the ladies. I need a fake passport, preferably to France…I like the way they think. Touché, Pandora. She keeps saying that God is going to show me a sign. The… something of my ways. Wisdom? It's probably wisdom. I hate the Wetlands. They're stupid and wet, and there are bugs everywhere, and I think I maced a crane. Are all the guys in here… you know? George Sr: No not all of them. Barry: Yeah. It's never the ones you hope.

Tobias is Queen Mary. Chaw-chee, chaw-chee chaw-chee! Coo coo ca cha! Ah coodle doodle do Caw ca caw, caw ca caw. Tobias Fünke costume.

Heart attack never stopped old Big Bear. I didn't even know we were calling him Big Bear. We never had the chance to. Tobias Fünke costume. "Circumvent." It means "to go around." Gob: The old "reach around." Heyyyy Uncle Father Oscar. Probably out there without a flipper, swimming around in a circle, freaking out his whole family. I've used one adjective to describe myself. What is it? What a fun, sexy time for you.

The worst that could happen is that I could spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit. COME ON. You might enjoy this. Oh. Em. Gee. That's amazing. I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it's hard to hear anything over the clatter of her breasts. I deceived you, mom. Tricked makes it sound like we have a playful relationship. What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese? I'M A MONSTER!! But I didn't take wasn't optimistic it could be done for an answer. I know, I just call her Annabelle cause she's shaped like a… she's the belle of the ball!

Actually, that was a box of Oscar's legally obtained medical marijuana. Primo bud. Real sticky weed. Annyong. Ah, it is a rock, though. Should beat everything. Gob: There's not a lot of logic to it. [Stabbing Gob] White power! Gob: I'm white!

I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, so now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands. Well excuse me for liking the way they frame my junk! He… she… what's the difference? Oh hear, hear. In the dark, it all looks the same. Let's see some bananas and nuts! There are dozens of us! DOZENS! [sniffs hand] Oh, God. I'm going to run this through again on "pots and pans." Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass! For the same reason you should believe a hundred dollar bill is no more than a hundred pennies!