No. I was ashamed to be _seen_ with you. I like being with you. We all need to pick a day to try and make trend. Oh, I don't have any drugs for sale, unless… did you want me to follow you to your car? Make love in your *own* hand, Mother! I know, I just call her Annabelle cause she's shaped like a… she's the belle of the ball! I [bleeped] the business model. Yeah, she had all kinds of orgasms.

I was hoping he would be gifted sexually. Heyyyyyy, Uncle Father Oscar. Did Ted make an appointment? No. Well then Ted can GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS OFFICE! YOU GET THE HELL OUT!

I don't care if it takes from now till the end of Shrimpfest. I [bleeped] the business model. Yeah, she had all kinds of orgasms. If this were a Lifetime Moment of Truth movie, this would be our act break. But it wasn't. Everybody dance NOW. Yeah, that's a cultural problem is what it is. You know, your average American male is in a perpetual state of adolescence, you know, arrested development. (Hey. That's the name of the show!) What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese?

You're losing blood, aren't you? Probably, my socks are wet. If mother sees this, she will blow a cow. I am going to my spin class. I thought you had vertigo. No, no, it's pronounced a-nal-ra-pist. Don't ask "Can I"… ask "I Can!"

She's not that Mexican, Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Columbian or something. Sweet old thing. Only two of those words describe Mom, so I know you're lying to me. I deceived you, mom. Tricked makes it sound like we have a playful relationship. Yeah, like I'm going to take a whiz through this $5,000 suit. COME ON. A-coodle-doodle-doo. A-coodle-doodle-doo. Aren't you the sweetest thing, spending time with what's left of your uncle. Hey, Dad. Look at you. You're a year older…and a year closer to death. Buster: Oh yeah, I guess that's kind of funny.

Look what the homosexuals have done to me! You can't just comb that out and reset it? For there's a man inside me, and only when he's finally out, can I walk free of pain. Operation Hot Mother. I'M A MONSTER!! Oh, yeah. The guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. COME ON! Can't a guy call his mother pretty without it seeming strange? Amen. And how about that little piece of tail on her? Cute! If I wanted something your thumb touched I'd eat the inside of your ear. I'll buy you a hundred George Michaels that you can teach to drive!

No borders, no limits… go ahead, touch the Cornballer… you know best? Also, your knee is on my heart. ¡Soy loco por los Cornballs! Popcorn shrimp… with club sauce. I've always been deeply passionate about nature. Perhaps you remember Neuterfest? I'll never forget your wedding. Do you have any idea how often you say the word afraid? Well, I know I used it in the Jacuzzi. I just haven't had sex in a month. You know, you've been here two months. It's hard to gauge time. What, so the guy we are meeting with can't even grow his own hair? COME ON!

Family Love Michael. I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, so now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.

Well, if you want to play Eve, you got to get in line behind what, above five homos. Did Ted make an appointment? No. Well then Ted can GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS OFFICE! YOU GET THE HELL OUT! She keeps saying that God is going to show me a sign. The… something of my ways. Wisdom? It's probably wisdom. Taste the happy, Michael! Taste it!

How am I supposed to find someone willing to go into that musty old claptrap? The CIA should've just Googled for his hideout, evidently.