Nellie is blowing them all AWAY. The only thing more terrifying than the escaped lunatic's hook was his twisted call… Heyyyyy campers! Don't ask "Can I"… ask "I Can!" Daddy horny, Michael. I cheated and I lied and I whored around. Do you have any idea how often you say the word "afraid"? Well, I know I used it in the Jacuzzi.

Gosh Mom… after all these years, God's not going to take a call from you. Turn this skiff around! I got Michael out of his marriage, didn't I? Actually, she died. Do you have any idea how often you say the word afraid? Well, I know I used it in the Jacuzzi. What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese? Hahahahah!

Whenever she'd change clothes, she'd make me wait on the balcony until zip-up, and yet anything goes at bath time. And I am rock steady. No more dizzies. I've been in the film business for a while but I just can't seem to get one in the can.

I just dont want him to point out my cracker ass in front of Ann. If I make this comeback, I'll buy you a hundred George Michaels that you can teach to drive! Annhog's coming?

Obviously this blue part here is the land. Her lawyers are claiming the seal is worth $250,000. And that's not even including Buster's Swatch. ♪♪ It's The Final Countdown ♪♪ Ann, you need to decide whether you want a man or a boy. I know how I'd answer. The only person that gets Lucille this excited is Gene. Gosh Mom… after all these years, God's not going to take a call from you. Well, yeah you've gotta lock that down.

I don't want no part of yo' tight-ass country club, ya freak bitch! No, she's in it. She's a contestant. It's sorta like an inner beauty pageant. Ah, there it is. And the soup of the day is bread. I'll have a vodka rocks. (Mom, it's breakfast time.) And a piece of toast. This is not what it looks like. It looks like you're tweaking her nipples through a chain-link fence. This is not me encouraging you to go here and write a review. No. Well excuse me, Judge Reinhold! I'll have a vodka rocks. (Mom, it's breakfast time.) And a piece of toast.

I guess you can say I'm buy-curious. She's not that Mexican, Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Columbian or something. Quicken! Premiere! You don't want a hungry dove down your pants.

Excuse me, do these effectively hide my thunder? She calls it a mayonegg. Did you enjoy your lunch, mom? You drank it fast enough. Ohhh little guy. The tears aren't coming. The tears just aren't coming. That's the first time we were in the shower since our honeymoon. And this time, no tears. And THAT'S why you always leave a note.

How do you know Steve Holt? Are you in AA? If mother sees this, she will blow a cow. No. I was ashamed to be _seen_ with you. I like being with you. No one was making fun of Andy Griffith. I can't emphasize that enough. I've got a nice hard cot with his name on it. You'd do that to your own brother? I said "cot." You're blowing my mind, Frank. Suddenly playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit? I know what an erection feels like, Michael.

But I'm the oldest. The matriarch if you will. I think that's one of Mom's little fibs, you know, like I'll sacrifice anything for my children. I don't want no part of yo' tight-ass country club, ya freak bitch! He also said some things African American-y wasn't ready to hear. Well, I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it's hard to hear anything over the clatter of her breasts. Heyyyyy, hermano. You're losing blood, aren't you? Gob: Probably, my socks are wet.