I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard. It's so watery. And yet there's a smack of ham to it. Heyyyy Uncle Father Oscar. Wow. We're just blowing through nap time, aren't we. Who? i just dont want him to point out my cracker ass in front of ann. However, she mistook the drowsy eye alcohol warning for a winking eye alcohol suggestion. Taste the happy, Michael! Taste it!

Those are balls. If I look like a man who made love to his wife last night – it's because I almost did. Ann, you need to decide whether you want a man or a boy. I know how I'd answer. Dad would stage elaborate situations using a one-armed man to teach us lessons. Speaking of settling, how's Ann?

Well, Michael, I did not find their buffoonery amusing. I hear the jury's still out on science. How could I say no to the woman who gave me chlamydia? Oh, yeah. The guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. COME ON! Hey, maybe you could pop a tent outside with your cousin Maeby… it'd be a good chance to rub off on her. Well excuse me for liking the way they frame my junk! Well, they got the Asian right… "hotties" might be a stretch.

The worst that could happen is that I could spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit. COME ON. Oh, yeah. The guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. COME ON! So Ann, the question is, do you want a man or a boy? I know how I would answer.

Speaking of settling, How's Ann? I shall hide behind the couch. (Guy's a pro.) I need a fake passport, preferably to France… I like the way they think. A million ****ing diamonds! Buster's in what we like to call a light to no coma. In layman's terms, it might be considered a very heavy nap. There are dozens of us! Dozens! A sea of waiters and no one will take a drink order.

I'm a scholar. I enjoy scholarly pursuits. Suddenly playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit? Sorry, some of my students are arguing the significance of the shankbone on the seder plate. But we do not - NOT wag our genitals at one another to make a point. Make love in your *own* hand, Mother! There are dozens of us! Dozens! When a.. man.. needs to prove to a woman that he's actually.. [pause].. When a man loves a woman.. I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run..so now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands. No one's called him Baby Buster since high school. Stop it, stop it. This objectification of women has to stop. It's just Mom and whores.

So did you see the new Poof? His name's Gary, and we don't need anymore lawsuits. I don't appreciate the dry British humor. Don't worry, these young beauties have been nowhere near the bananas. Are you aware of this? Coming soon. Indeed. He… she… what's the difference? Oh hear, hear. In the dark, it all looks the same. Early. Maybe it was the eleven months he spent in the womb. The doctor said there were claw marks on the walls of her uterus.

Heart attack never stopped old big bear! No one was making fun of Andy Griffith. I can't emphasize that enough. Second-of-ly, I know you're the big marriage expert. Oh I'm sorry, I forgot, your wife is dead. Tobias Fünke costume.

Hey, it was one night of wild passion! Michael: And yet you didn't notice her body? Gob: I like to look in the mirror. Well, I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it's hard to hear anything over the clatter of her breasts. Ohhh little guy. The tears aren't coming. The tears just aren't coming. Heyyyyyy Uncle Father Oscar. The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag.

Well, I hope you also carry a spare bowl of candy beans. Hey, maybe you could pop a tent outside with your cousin Maeby… it'd be a good chance to rub off on her. Obviously this blue part here is the land. I've used one adjective to describe myself. What is it? It's one banana Michael, what could it cost, ten dollars?