What do you expect, Mother? I'm half machine! I'm a monster!! There are dozens of us! Dozens! I guess you can say I'm buy-curious. I cheated and I lied and I whored around. One for the ladies. You stay on top of her, Buddy. Don't be afraid to ride her. Hard. [climbing under trampoline] This shall keep me safe from the hot Mexican sun.

Suddenly he's too much of a big-shot to brush mother's hair. I'd rather be dead in California than alive in Arizona. Nellie is blowing them all AWAY. You mean the guy we're meeting with can't even grow his own hair? Come on! Even though so many people in this office are begging for it. You must teach me the ways of the secular flesh. Uncle Gob… was Aunt Lindsay ever pregnant? Yeah, sure, dozens of times. Sorry, some of my students are arguing the significance of the shankbone on the seder plate. But we do not - NOT wag our genitals at one another to make a point.

Uncle Gob… was Aunt Lindsay ever pregnant? Yeah, sure, dozens of times. If I wanted something your thumb touched I'd eat the inside of your ear. Look, you are playing adults…with fully formed libidos, not 2 young men playing grab-ass in the shower. Do you guys know where I could get one of those gold necklaces with the T on it? That's a cross. Across from where?

Whenever she'd change clothes, she'd make me wait on the balcony until zip-up, and yet anything goes at bath time. I'll have a vodka rocks. (Mom, it's breakfast time.) And a piece of toast. A million ****ing diamonds! They want to break his legs. It's a good thing he's already got that little scooter. Everything they do is so dramatic and flamboyant. It just makes me want to set myself on fire. Hey, it was one night of wild passion! Michael: And yet you didn't notice her body? Gob: I like to look in the mirror. There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town. Well, that certainly leaves me out. Maybe it was the other George Michael. You know, the singer-songwriter.

Ann certainly has a great deal of Mass. Absolutely. And we're going to be here every day. I don't care if it takes from now till the end of Shrimpfest. Gosh Mom… after all these years, God's not going to take a call from you. What a fun, sexy time for you.

Today I learned this is a real place, tho more lush than the OC. I've used one adjective to describe myself. What is it? Today I learned this is a real place, tho more lush than the OC. Buster's in what we like to call a light to no coma. In layman's terms, it might be considered a very heavy nap. Boy, I sure feel like a Mary without a Peter and a Paul. He… she… what's the difference? Oh hear, hear. In the dark, it all looks the same. She calls it a Mayonegg.

You were just a turd out there, you know? You couldn't kick, and you couldn't run, you know? You were just a turd. I'm gonna build me an airport, put my name on it. Why, Michael? So you can fly away from your feelings? What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese? Hahahahah! Maybe it was the other George Michael. You know, the singer-songwriter. Let's make Ann the backup, okay? Very good way to think about her, as a backup.

It's one banana Michael, what could it cost, ten dollars? Mr. Zuckerkorn, you've been warned about touching. Barry: You said spanking. Smack of ham. What is she doing at a beauty pageant? Is she running the lights or something? For the same reason you should believe a hundred dollar bill is no more than a hundred pennies! Are you at all concerned about an uprising?

So did you see the new Poof? His name's Gary and we don't need anymore lawsuits. Buster, what are you doing with mother's rape-horn? I could use a leather jacket for when I'm on my hog and have to go into a controlled slide. Happy. It's a jetpack, Michael. What could go wrong?

Dad would stage elaborate situations using a one-armed man to teach us lessons. She calls it a mayonegg. She's always got to wedge herself in the middle of us so that she can control everything. Yeah. Mom's awesome. I'd rather be dead in California than alive in Arizona. I hear the jury's still out on science.