You need to do more with Rita. Believe me, I'd like to. It's so watery. And yet there's a smack of ham to it. Dad asked me to do this on the day he pleads not guilty, as a spectacular protest. A…. ? And the soup of the day is bread. Sorry, some of my students are arguing the significance of the shankbone on the seder plate. But we do not - NOT wag our genitals at one another to make a point. How am I supposed to find someone willing to go into that musty old claptrap? Oh, like when they say "poofter" to mean "tourist", yes. If you didn't have adult onset diabetes, I wouldn't mind giving you a little sugar.

They're not gonna strip, right? I told them not to, but I can't guarantee their instincts won't kick in. Smack of ham. What is she doing at a beauty pageant? Is she running the lights or something? The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. Gob: You didn't eat that, did you?

She keeps saying that God is going to show me a sign. The… something of my ways. Wisdom? It's probably wisdom. I need a fake passport, preferably to France…I like the way they think. Operation Hot Mother. They don't allow you to have bees in here. You are a worse psychiatrist than you are a son-in-law and you will never get work as an actor because you have no talent.

Make love in your *own* hand, Mother! Fried cheese… with club sauce. Everyone's laughing, and riding, and cornholing except Buster. I could use a leather jacket for when I'm on my hog and have to go into a controlled slide. Happy. They want to break his legs. It's a good thing he's already got that little scooter.

So maybe you could start jete-ing, and stop je-terrorizing me! Everybody dance… NOW. Yes. Lindsay and I are planning a night of heterosexual intercourse.

Also, your knee is on my heart. Excuse me while I circumvent you. The old reach-around. George Bush doesn't care about black puppets.

No, I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. I know what an erection feels like, Michael. I know what an erection feels like, Michael. Michael, look, this has got to stop. I mean, flattered? Yes. Interested? Not tonight. The worst that could happen is that I could spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit. COME ON. I cheated and I lied and I whored around. Interfere? I ought to pull down your pants and spank your ass raw. Michael: I'm sorry, have we met?

I made a huge tiny mistake. No. I was ashamed to be _seen_ with you. I like being with you. And I am rock steady. No more dizzies. When a man needs to prove to a woman that he's actually… When a man loves a woman… I'd rather be dead in California than alive in Arizona. Hey, maybe you could pop a tent outside with your cousin Maeby… it'd be a good chance to rub off on her. Did Ted make an appointment? No. Well, then Ted can GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS OFFICE! YOU GET THE HELL OUT!

Heart attack never stopped old Big Bear. I didn't even know we were calling him Big Bear. We never had the chance to. Yo quiero leche. Yo quiero leche de madre. Heyyyyyy, Uncle Father Oscar. I just haven't had sex in a month. You know, you've been here two months. It's hard to gauge time. I didn't mean who… I meant… her?

I've been in the film business for a while but I just can't seem to get one in the can. God knows they're squinters. What about macaroni – let me finish – salad?