No, Pop-pop does not get a treat. I just bought you a f**king pizza. [sniffs hand] Oh, God. I'm going to run this through again on "pots and pans." Someone order 140 pounds of upper body strength?

See for more good stuff. No one's called him Baby Buster since high school. Tobias is Queen Mary. Butterscotch! Want a lick?

Well excuse me for liking the way they frame my junk! They don't allow you to have bees in here. Do you have any idea how often you say the word "afraid"? Well, I know I used it in the Jacuzzi. Ann, you need to decide whether you want a man or a boy. I know how I'd answer.

And I am rock steady. No more dizzies. Annhog's coming? I'll buy you a hundred George Michaels that you can teach to drive! Great, now I'm gonna smell to high heaven like a tuna melt! She's not 'that Mexican', Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Colombian or something. Dad asked me to do this on the day he pleads not guilty, as a spectacular protest. A…. ?

Hey, if I can't find a horny immigrant by then, I don't deserve to stay. Way to plant, Ann! ♪♪ Big yellow joint, big yellow joint, I'll meet you down at the big yellow joint. ♪♪ When a.. man.. needs to prove to a woman that he's actually.. [pause].. When a man loves a woman.. I didn't mean who… I meant… her? But I did finally get into Dad's pants. Although I had to have the crotch taken in a little bit.

They want to break his legs. It's a good thing he's already got that little scooter. The only person that gets Lucille this excited is Gene. They want to break his legs. It's a good thing he's already got that little scooter. Monday morning. COME ON! Even it means me taking a chubby… I will suck it up. That was Tom Cruise, the actor. They said he was some kind of scientist. Excuse me, do these effectively hide my thunder? You go buy a tape recorder and record yourself for a whole day. I think you'll be surprised at some of your phrasing.

♪♪ It's The Final Countdown ♪♪ The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. Tobias Fünke costume. No one was making fun of Andy Griffith. I can't emphasize that enough. ♪♪ Big yellow joint, big yellow joint, I'll meet you down at the big yellow joint. ♪♪

Michael, look, this has got to stop. I mean, flattered? Yes. Interested? Not tonight. I deceived you, mom. Tricked makes it sound like we have a playful relationship.

I was once called the worst audience participant Cirque du Soleil ever had. Do you guys know where I could get one of those gold necklaces with the T on it? That's a cross. Across from where? So maybe you could start jete-ing, and stop je-terrorizing me! Did Ted make an appointment? No. Well, then Ted can GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS OFFICE! YOU GET THE HELL OUT! NO TOUCHING!

Well, Michael, I did not find their buffoonery amusing. Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass. It's one banana Michael, what could it cost, ten dollars?