Dad would stage elaborate situations using a one-armed man to teach us lessons. Are you aware of this? Coming soon. Indeed. I'M A MONSTER!! I'm not interested in you that way. Tobias: What way? Michael: Pick one. Hey, Dad. Look at you. You're a year older…and a year closer to death. Buster: Oh yeah, I guess that's kind of funny.

You don't want a hungry dove down your pants. No, no, it's pronounced a-nal-ra-pist. It wasn't really the pronunciation that bothered me. He… she… what's the difference? Oh hear, hear. In the dark, it all looks the same. And with deep, deep concentration and, and great focus, he's often able to achieve an erect– After all, why should you go to jail for a crime somebody else noticed? Taste the happy, Michael. Taste it. It tastes kind of like sad. Hey, it was one night of wild passion! Michael: And yet you didn't notice her body? Gob: I like to look in the mirror.

The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. Gob: You didn't eat that, did you? No. I was ashamed to be _seen_ with you. I like being with you. I guess you can say I'm buy-curious. A trick is something a whore does for money…or candy. … or cocaine. I made a huge tiny mistake.

I'm gonna go get sexy. They want to break his legs. It's a good thing he's already got that little scooter. Are all the guys in here… you know? George Sr: No not all of them. Barry: Yeah. It's never the ones you hope. WHY was this show cancelled? I mean, COME ON. Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass. WHY was this show cancelled? I mean, COME ON. A Colombian cartel that WON'T kidnap and kill you. I know, I just call her Annabelle cause she's shaped like a…she's the belle of the ball!

Could it be love? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard. What's up, fizz-ellas. Well, yeah you've gotta lock that down. So, what do you say? We got a basket full of father-son fun here. What's Kama Sutra oil? Maybe it's not for us. She's not 'that Mexican', Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Colombian or something. I'll sacrifice anything for my children. I've been in the film business for a while but I just cant seem to get one in the can.

One for the ladies. Michael, you are not quite the ladies man I had pictured. Hopefully, we will remedy that when we are in the spa spreading body chocolate on each other. For the same reason you should believe a hundred dollar bill is no more than a hundred pennies! It's Sunday, but screw it — juice box time. We all need to pick a day to try and make trend.

You're a good guy, mon frere. That means brother in French. I don't know how I know that. I took four years of Spanish. You're blowing my mind, Frank. I'm tired of trying to find happiness through lies and self-medicating. If you need me, I'll be at the bar. Of course. The "Bob Loblaw Law Blog." Wow. You, sir, are a mouthful! Buster, what are you doing with mother's rape horn?

I may have committed some light treason. Te quiero. English, please. I love you! Great, now I'm late. I will pack your sweet pink mouth with so much ice cream you'll be the envy of every Jerry and Jane on the block! Heyyyyyy, Uncle Father Oscar.

Do the right thing here. String this blind girl along so that dad doesn't have to pay his debt to society. If I wanted something your thumb touched, I'd eat the inside of your ear. Now, do you wanna steer, or are you too old to sit on your Pop's lap and drive? He's going to be all right.

That's so you can videotape it when they put you in a naked pyramid and point to your Charlie Browns. I'll be in the hospital bar. You know there isn't a hospital bar, Mother. Well, this is why people hate hospitals. That's my son, you pothead! Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass! You were just a turd out there, you know? You couldn't kick, and you couldn't run, you know? You were just a turd. Whoa whoa whoa whoa. Wait. Are you telling me you have a multi-stage trick with hidden identities? That's so you can videotape it when they put you in a naked pyramid and point to your Charlie Browns.