Suddenly playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit? You want to have some guy reach around you in the middle of the night, start messing with your junk? No, no, it's pronounced a-nal-ra-pist. It wasn't really the pronunciation that bothered me. Tobias is Queen Mary. Chickens don't clap! There's a new daddy in town. A discipline daddy. A trick is something a whore does for money… or cocaine.

No! These are just strippers! Look how hot they are! Why are you squeezing me with your body? Could it be love? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite… like my heart is getting hard. Dad asked me to do this on the day he pleads not guilty, as a spectacular protest. A…. ? I shall hide behind the couch. (Guy's a pro.)

Friend of mine from college. He also has a boat tho not called the Seaward. Do you guys know where I could get one of those gold necklaces with the T on it? That's a cross. Across from where? Yeah, like I'm going to spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit? Come on!

Of course. The "Bob Loblaw Law Blog." Wow. You, sir, are a mouthful! I've always been deeply passionate about nature. Perhaps you remember Neuterfest? M: I'll never forget your wedding. She's not that Mexican, Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Columbian or something. I'm gonna build me an airport, put my name on it. Why, Michael? So you can fly away from your feelings? Mom… after all these years, God's not going to take a call from you.

Hair up, glasses off. Up yours, granny! You couldn't handle it! Boy, I sure feel like a Mary without a Peter and a Paul. She tried pesto for the first time. Imagine that, 92 years old and she never tried pesto. I'm gonna build me an airport, put my name on it. Why, Michael? So you can fly away from your feelings? It's, like, Hey, you want to go down to the whirlpool? Yeah, I don't have a husband. I call it Swing City.

You are a worse psychiatrist than you are a son-in-law and you will never get work as an actor because you have no talent. And with deep, deep concentration and, and great focus, he's often able to achieve an erect– Fried cheese… with club sauce. Popcorn shrimp… with club sauce. Chicken fingers… with spicy club sauce. You were just a turd out there, you know? You couldn't kick, and you couldn't run, you know? You were just a turd. A million [bleep]ing diamonds!

I'll be in the hospital bar. You know there isn't a hospital bar, Mother. Well, this is why people hate hospitals. Each year, Oscar attempts the four hundred mile walk from Newport Beach to Berkeley, California. In the twelve years that he's attempted this, he's never made it farther than UC Irvine. Get rid of the Seaward. Lucille: I'll leave when I'm good and ready. Michael, I'm your older brother. I'll never be proud of you.

They don't allow you to have bees in here. Well, they got the Asian right… "hotties" might be a stretch. I know, I just call her Annabelle cause she's shaped like a… she's the belle of the ball! Turn this skiff around! Well, if you want to play Eve, you got to get in line behind what, above five homos. And THAT'S why you always leave a note.

Heyyyyyy Uncle Father Oscar. I deceived you, mom. Tricked makes it sound like we have a playful relationship. You're losing blood, aren't you? Gob: Probably, my socks are wet. [sniffs hand] Oh, God. I'm going to run this through again on "pots and pans." I was set up. By the Brits. A group of British builders operating outside the O.C.

We have unlimited juice? This party is going to be off the hook. You're Killing Me, Buster. Family Love Michael. Interfere? I ought to pull down your pants and spank your ass raw. Michael: I'm sorry, have we met? Actually, that was a box of Oscar's legally obtained medical marijuana. Primo bud. Real sticky weed. Waiting for the Emmys. BTW did you know won 6 Emmys and was still canceled early by Fox? COME ON.