So you take your mom to work every day? Bummer. Moms are such a pain in the ass, huh? It's, like, die already! She's trying to prove that she's closer to my children than I am, but the joke's on her, because she doesn't know how little I care for GOB. It's so watery. And yet there's a smack of ham to it. Douche chill! That was Tom Cruise, the actor. They said he was some kind of scientist. But where did the lighter fluid come from?

I [bleeped] the business model. Yeah, she had all kinds of orgasms. If that man's straight, then I am sober. I may have committed some light treason.

Bob Loblaw Lobs Law Bomb. Tobias Fünke costume. I figured out a way to make money while I'm working!

O-kay, who'd like a banger in the mouth? Buster's in what we like to call a light to no coma. In layman's terms, it might be considered a very heavy nap. The worst that could happen is that I could spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit. COME ON. Hair up, glasses off. He… she… what's the difference? Oh hear, hear. In the dark, it all looks the same.

She calls it a Mayonegg. Do the right thing here. String this blind girl along so that dad doesn't have to pay his debt to society.

How do you know Steve Holt? Are you in AA? Of course. The "Bob Loblaw Law Blog." Wow. You, sir, are a mouthful!

Turn this skiff around! What do you think about Sudden Valley? It sounds like a salad dressing, but for some reason I don't want to eat it. Hey, Dad. Look at you. You're a year older…and a year closer to death. Buster: Oh yeah, I guess that's kind of funny. Let me give that oatmeal some brown sugar.

I'm not a prostitute. Then I shall let you live! No, no, it's pronounced a-nal-ra-pist. It wasn't really the pronunciation that bothered me. First I blow him, then I poke him. Operation Hot Mother. Let me take off my assistant's skirt and put on my Barbra-Streisand-in-The-Prince-of-Tides ass-masking therapist pantsuit. So did you see the new Poof? His name's Gary and we don't need anymore lawsuits.

Buster, what are you doing with mother's rape horn? One of the guys told me to take my head out of my BOTTOM and get back to work…my BOTTOM! Hahahaha. Wine only turns to alcohol if you let it sit. And I am rock steady. No more dizzies. He's a regular Freddie Wilson, that one. She's not 'that Mexican', Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Colombian or something. He… she… what's the difference? Oh hear, hear. In the dark, it all looks the same. But I didn't take wasn't optimistic it could be done for an answer.

You can always tell a Milford man. I'm a scholar. I enjoy scholarly pursuits. Suddenly playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit? And that is why Jesus was often referred to as the King of Kings. Queens. The King of Queens. Speaking of settling, How's Ann? A million [bleep]ing diamonds! Everybody dance NOW. I hate the Wetlands. They're stupid and wet, and there are bugs everywhere, and I think I maced a crane.