They frame my junk. Speaking of settling, How's Ann? No, Pop-pop does not get a treat, I just brought you a [bleep]ing pizza. Yeah, well, have you seen the new Mustang? You could hump that hood. Why are you squeezing me with your body?

You can control your bladder when you're dead! Oh please. They didn't sneak into this country to be your friends. I am going to my spin class. I thought you had vertigo. Sweet old thing. Only two of those words describe Mom, so I know you're lying to me. Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot… your wife is dead! If you didn't have adult onset diabetes, I wouldn't mind giving you a little sugar. The only person that gets Lucille this excited is Gene. If that man's straight, then I am sober.

Wow. We're just blowing through nap time, aren't we? What's up, fizz-ellas.

He… she… what's the difference? Oh hear, hear. In the dark, it all looks the same. They don't allow you to have bees in here. Second-of-ly, I know you're the big marriage expert. Oh I'm sorry, I forgot, your wife is dead. No, Pop-pop does not get a treat, I just brought you a [bleep]ing pizza. Smack of ham. What is she doing at a beauty pageant? Is she running the lights or something?

Why are you squeezing me with your body? I'd rather be dead in California than alive in Arizona. Heyyyyyy, Uncle Father Oscar. She's not that Mexican, Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Columbian or something. I am getting rid of this thing. It has caused me nothing but pride and self-respect. "Circumvent." It means "to go around." Gob: The old "reach around." The only person that gets Lucille this excited is Gene. When a man needs to prove to a woman that he's actually… When a man loves a woman…

Oh, yeah, the guy in the the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. Come on! She's not 'that Mexican', Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Colombian or something. I've got a nice hard cot with his name on it. You'd do that to your own brother? I said "cot."

I need a tea to give my dingle less tingle. Mom… after all these years, God's not going to take a call from you. ♪♪ It ain't easy being white. It ain't easy being brown. ♪♪ Well, OK, have sex with this girl. Right now. Get in there, have some sex with her. Dad would stage elaborate situations using a one-armed man to teach us lessons. Wine only turns to alcohol if you let it sit.

And don't make the water too hot. The scabs come right off. Happy Franklin Friday. I made a huge tiny mistake. You're Killing Me, Buster. Michael, look, this has got to stop. I mean, flattered? Yes. Interested? Not tonight. No, she's in it. She's a contestant. It's sorta like an inner beauty pageant. Ah, there it is. One of the guys told me to take my head out of my BOTTOM and get back to work…my BOTTOM!

I never thought I'd miss a hand so much! It's as Ann as the nose on plain's face.

That was Tom Cruise, the actor. Lucille: They said he was some kind of scientist. I am going to my spin class. I thought you had vertigo. Oh please. They didn't sneak into this country to be your friends. Well excuse me, Judge Reinhold. You might enjoy this. Oh. Em. Gee. That's amazing.